Love & Hate
by I Lurk In Your House
Summary: Everyone knows how close Kendall and Katie are. But was it always that way? It wasn't in the beginning, Kendall despised Katie. For multiple reasons. So join Kendall and Katie in this one-shot exploring how they got as close as they are now.


Disclaimer: NO! I don't own Big Time Rush, why would I own Big Time Rush? And then write FANFICTION for it?

•••

Kendall Knight was very displeased when he found out he was going to have a baby sister. He told his mom that she didn't ask him if he wanted one, and she should just not get the little girl. But all his mommy did was laugh and tell Kendall that it's too late and that the baby would come no matter what.

"Why? Just say 'Baby, I don't want you to come', she'll understand, right?"

laughed once more at the little boy and said,"Sorry Kenny. The baby is coming whether you like it or not."

•••

Kendall was very happy to find out that baby takes almost a whole year to come. But he was a little worried about his mother. She was getting really fat, and he knew that wasn't good.

"It's because of the baby," she had told him,"Once it gets here I'll be back to normal."

This sparked hope in Kendall.

"Well, if the baby is making you fat, maybe it shouldn't come. You can be thin again!"

"I'm sorry sweetie. I told you before and I'll tell you again. The baby is coming and there's nothing I can do to stop it."

Kendall slumped and went to his room.

It wasn't fair! He liked being an only child! All the attention, all the toys. None of his friends had siblings, and they all agreed it was great. They had made a pact, they would never have siblings, and if they did, they would make sure they hated the new kid.

Pacts were like promises, and Kendall doesn't break promises.

•••

The day had finally come, not that Kendall knew. He though his mother had gotten hurt and went to the hospital, so he had a minor panic attack, but he composed himself. Panic attacks were for wimps. And Logan.

He had to ride in the ambulance with his mom, because his daddy was at work and no one was home.

The hospital was cold, and it smelled like… hospital. And he hated that smell.

They had to call his dad, to tell him that something had happened. Was whatever happened to his mom so big that his dad had to leave work?

Kendall couldn't properly hear what the nurse told his dad because he started to drift off to sleep. He didn't even realize it was almost midnight.

•••

When he woke up, he had that feeling you have when you think something bad will happen… or happened.

A nurse walked up to him. She had a somewhat said look in her eye. "Are you Kendall Knight?"

He slowly nodded, confused at her facial expression. "Good news, Kendall! Your baby sister is here!" she said with a forced smile. _She must know horrible a sibling will be_, Kendall thought.

The nurse lead him to his mother's room. "Oh, and Kendall-" she stopped "Never mind." Kendall decided nurses were crazy. He was glad Logan wanted to be a doctor.

In his mother's room, Kendall noticed that she was smiling at the baby in her arms (Kendall was disgusted with the baby, though), but it wasn't a real smile. I mean… it was, but the sadness was greater than the smile.

_She must have realized what a mistake the baby was_, Kendall thought.

When she turned to look at Kendall, tears welled up in her eyes.

_Girls, so emotional! I wouldn't rub it in her face about what a bad choice it was to get another kid._

"Kendall, come here, sweetie," his mother softly said.  
Kendall narrowed his eyes, but walked over to his mother… a bit reluctantly.

"Kendall, you know that your father had to get here right away to see the baby, right?" she asked gently.

_So the baby is why mommy's in the hospital! Then the baby got mommy hurt!_

Kendall fumed at the baby for that. But nodded his head to his mother. "Well, he was driving a bit to fast, and… he got in a car crash," his mother started to sob.

_The stupid baby got my daddy in a car crash! First she gets mommy in the hospital, and then daddy in a car crash!_

Kendall felt like punching the baby, but he knew slightly better than that. Slightly…

Then Kendall got a little panicky. "Wh-what happened to daddy? Is he in the hospital to? Can I see him?"

Jennifer Knight took a deep breath before saying,"Kendall, it was dark and raining. And the car was much bigger than daddy's. Daddy… d-died," she choked out.

Kendall's eyes grew into plates. Then narrowed at the baby.

_The baby got my dad killed! It got mommy in the hospital and daddy killed!_

Kendall blinked multiple times to try to suppress his anger.

"But let's not think about that! The baby's here! Do you want to name it Kenny?"

"No! I don't want anything to do with that dumb baby!"

Jennifer knew Kendall was hurting so she let the fact that he yelled at her (more like the baby) and the the fact that he used the word "dumb" slide.

Kendall stomped over to the couch on the other end of the room. "Okay… we could name the baby Ally, or Carly, or-" "WAIT!" Kendall yelled.

"Daddy told me he wanted to name the baby Katie, after his sister," Kendall said.

_Wow_, Kendall thought, _Daddy loved his sister enough to name his baby after her. Maybe siblings aren't so bad… but I bet his Katie didn't get his daddy killed!_

Well, at least it would make it easier to keep his promise to his friends.

Suddenly, reality hit him hard. His dad was _dead_. Gone. Never will be seen again. His eyes started to water until he was completely crying. Very, very, really, really, hard.

•••

Weeks had passed and Kendall had learned to move on without his dad. It was hard, he had waves of grief every once and a while, but he tried his best to get over it.

He soon also realized that his dad died on Katie's birthday, which made him madder at the baby but then his mom told him that his dad died around 11:40, and Katie wasn't born until 12:30. Both things he slept through.

The fact that Katie being born and his _dying_ not being on the same day didn't exactly help Kendall. It was still Katie's fault.

And Katie woke Kendall up in the middle of the night, wailing, wanting something, and his mother didn't even seem to care. Kendall did, however. And he despises her for it. "I hate you," he once muttered to her.

•••

Katie was almost a year old, and her birthday was coming up quick. Both Kendall and his mom were dreading it, due to a certain someone dying on the day before. Kendall also didn't want to get to Katie's birthday for a few more hurtful reasons.

Despite Kendall's anger towards Katie, Katie had taken a strange liking to her older brother.

He was trying to play a game on the couch in the living room when Katie walked up to him. "Go away," he told her. Katie giggled. "I said get away from me!" He said almost yelling.

Katie stared at him. Kendall rolled his eyes and went back to playing his game. "Kenll," Katie said.

Kendall knew what she had just said. Kendall. Her first word! Sure she was missing the "a", but you take what you can get with kids.

As much as Kendall disliked his sister, he knew what a big milestone this was. He shot out of his seat with Katie trailing behind saying,"Kenll! Kenll! Kenll!"

"Mom! Mom! Mom! Katie said Kendall! Well actually she said 'Kenll', but that's still close!"

Mrs. Knight smiled. "I see you like Katie now?"

Kendall's face went from happy to a displeased stare. "No! I will never like her!" He yelled as he stomped away.

•••

A day or two later Kendall had invited his friends over so they could play together. They were in the living room playing Candy Land when-

"Kenll! Kenll! Kenll!" Katie bounced.

"Be quiet, will you?" Kendall asked, far from polite. "Kenll! Kenll! Kenll!" She said again.

"That's all she's been saying," Kendall explained to his friends.

"I think it's cute," Carlos said, but shrank into the floor after receiving a glare from Kendall.

"Carlos, don't you remember the pact?" James asked. "But it was only if it was our own sibling. The pact never said we had to hate Katie. It just said Kendall had to," Carlos pointed out.

"He's got a point," Logan told Kendall.

"Ogan," Katie replied. Logan's eyes widened.

"Did you hear her?" He exclaimed happily,"She said Ogan! That's like Logan! She kind of said my name!"

Kendall just glared at Katie, saying "Go away".

The other three kids read this too, causing Logan's excitement to escalate quickly.

Katie, understanding looks better than words, left the room, leaving four awkward boys.

•••

Katie's first birthday had passed, and after a little bit of crying, they learned to deal with it. Her second birthday came by, and there was more crying. By her third birthday, they were pros, only shedding tears late at night.

Her fourth birthday may have not been very sad to Kendall or Mrs. Knight, but it was very depressing for Katie. It was the birthday she realized how much her big brother hated her. And she realized why too. She had killed their father. Maybe not directly, but it was still her fault.

If she could go back she would, make hints different. Make sure she came out later or earlier. Or make sure that her (or his, whenever Katie referred to him as their dad, Kendall got mad) dad never left work.

It could have made things so much easier. It could have made her brother love her.

We, knowing what happened pre- Katie, know that this might have not been the case. Maybe Kendall wouldn't exactly love Katie to pieces, but he would at least tolerate her in a normal big brother way. Like all older brothers. Katie wanted just that.

•••

Katie and Kendall's relationship still didn't change from the day she was born. And she was six now! for quite a while, actually. His friends like her, talked to her sometimes, but she wanted her brother to like her.

Everyday, Katie woke up, and did her best to try to get Kendall to like her. Nothing worked.

One day, Kendall lost it.

"Quit bothering me! I hate hate you! And nothing will ever change! Just stop trying!" He yelled before running to his room. Katie sat on the floor, weeping, wondering of things would ever change.

~~~This isn't the same as the dots~~~

Later that night, Kendall didn't feel guilty one bit. He knew it was true, and she'd just have to deal with. Just like he dealt with his father DYING!

He fell into a light sleep, soon to be awoken by a loud screaming from Katie's room. This didn't happen did she was a baby. Why is it happening now? He figured his mom would deal with it when he remembered she had a night shift that brought in money they desperately needed.

He sighed and figured this wasn't going to stop until he made it stop. So marched right over Katie's room and took a peak in her room.

That's when he realized that Katie was having a nightmare. He forgot everything he hated her for when his big brother instincts kicked for the first time in six and a half years.

He wasn't sure how to get her to wake up, so he he shook her awake. When her eyes opened, she realized Kendall was the one who shook her. Remembering what had happened earlier, and her dream, she instinctively shielded her face with her arms and said,"Don't hurt me! I won't bother you ever again, I promise, just please don't hurt me!"

"I'm not here to hurt you, you were having a nightmare so I woke you up," he explained.

"You did?"

Kendall nodded. "Now go back to sleep."

"I can't," Katie said.

"What do you mean you can't? You haven't even tried yet!" Kendall said.

"No, I'll have the bad dream again," she cried.

Kendall thought for a moment. What did his mom do when he used to act like this? "Okay, would it help to tell me about your dream?" Kendall suggested.

Katie nodded and began,"You were in the living room with Carlos, James, and Logan, and then I came. Then I said something and then you yelled something that I can't remember, then you made me go to the basement and said if I came out ever, you would me real bad." Katie's voice got smaller as she got to the end.

Kendall blinked. What just happened. He knew. He was the worst big brother ever for six years. And now he received his punishment.

"I-I wouldn't do that Katie," he stuttered.

"How would I know?"

That was a very good point.

"Because, I was a really bad brother since you were born. Even before that. And I was just mad at… you for dad, but it's wasn't your fault. It was never your fault. I just told myself it was."

Katie waited for this moment for six years. Six entire years. And it was finally here. She hugged Kendall's waist, since she was lying down and was sitting on the bed, an said,"Are you sure you aren't mad?"

Kendall hugged her, or the arms around him, and said,"I'm sure."

Katie pulled her arms back and Kendall decided to the same. "So, can you sleep now?" Kendall asked.

"Can I sleep with you?"

Kendall nodded and led her to his room. They both got into his bed and Kendall wrapped his arms Around Katie's waist. "I'm sorry Baby Sister."

Katie smiled at the name and said,"I'm not mad, Bic Brother."

•••

Not sure if I'm happy with this ending. Eh. It could be better. Right after I typed that Kendall's dad's sister's (I realize I could've just typed aunt) name was Katie, I suddenly burst out laughing at the irony. I mean Kendall's dad had a sister named Katie and Kendall's sister's name is Katie and they have the same relationship, unhealthily close. Well not unhealthily… but close.

Speaking of Kendall's dad, I didn't like the way he died. Oh my god that sounds weird. But, I needed a way for Kendall to, like, hate Katie and that was the only way, cause really, just not wanting a sibling ain't gonna cut it.

ANNOUNCEMENT!

I am officially taking requests for one-shots. As long as there is no… well let's say in appropriate stuff, we're good.

**I DON'T DO SLASHES!**

Katie/Kendalls preferably, but you can give me anything really. I don't really do T rated, but if I like it, I will.

**ONE-SHOTS ONLY!**

I've got too much on my hands with 20 Trials, my multichap, and I won't be able to do another one. Until its finished. Anyway, request! And review!

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee!


End file.
